Hello my lovelies,
Tonight I am not blogging about HIV or dementia. I want to talk about your personal mental health.
I have been around some of the most miserable people. I am kind of worried that I might not find paying work, but I have filled my days with things to do that will improve my chances of landing a great job.
I have appointments and obligations that have been agreed to for months now, and I have the added appointments to see all of my doctors before my insurance runs out and I get switched back to ADAP. I literally have only hours to sleep before I have to get my day started and moving.
And I like it that way. I love filling my world with exciting new adventures, whether I get paid or not. So when I agreed to lighten my mother’s load at work and help her client I jumped at it. It shows I have the ability to be a CNA and could give me a good reference.
But I work for my mother. Never make business deals with family. They always think that you will give them special treatment, or some cut rate discount. We all have to make money, and we all have to keep our promises. I promised to care for her client, she agreed to a payment structure.
Not only does she not keep track of when I am working, but once she paid me it wasn’t what we agreed on. I just let it go, but deep inside I know what my next move is.
I can’t work for any boss who cares so little about their employees as to not keep track of their hours so that they are paid at the rate that was agreed upon. I have never asked anyone to do something for me and agree on a payment plan that I won’t follow through with.
Misery loves company, and I wont be a friend to it. I meditate daily to keep my mind sharp and to clear the frustration of having to watch this. I will be fine. The idea was that all this was temporary anyway.
I want all of you to self care as much as possible. Maybe you are stuck around a negative person and that is now infecting your mood. Meditate and center your being. Take care of your mental health because you are no good to anyone else if you aren’t good to yourself.
Sorry to vent but this is a big blow to me to not be a home health aide right now. I will, if there is some emergency, be more that eager to help, but that will now be between the clients family and me. My mother is using me, but I won’t be used for much longer.
So it’s off to a burger joint, or a greasy spoon to make a little cash on the side to stay comfortable while I wait for the application for CNA testing to run its course. Everybody is hiring in places like McDonalds, and restaurants. It’s coming on spring break too so a lot of places will need temporary help. I am able, and I have the drive.
Never let a miserable soul steal your joy. Instead understand that while you over flow, the thirsty will be jealous. They want what you have. They can’t take it from you so stop giving it away.
With Unconditional Joy,
Your Friend David